Conflict in Ministry

Relationships within Ministry

"Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the presence of God no matter what the conflict." -Anonymous


Why can't we all "just get along"? Well, in short, because we're human. We're sinners. We can simply blame Adam & Eve, or we can follow Christ's example within that relationship. All relationships with any depth will experience some level of conflict. Relationships we don't even acknowledge can experience conflict. It's all part of living in a fallen world. The good news is that we can look at Christ's life on earth and see that even He was subject to problems in relationships.

Having been in ministry for more than 20 years, even though I have always purposely strived for peace in all relationships, I have learned that not only are some conflicts in life are inevitable, there can be some that are completely out of our control. Scripture tells us that peace with others is not always in our complete control, "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." Romans 12:18 (italics mine)

Recently, a conflict came to light that caused me to take a hard look at the topic of conflict and living peacefully with other believers. This particular conflict was so complex as to cause me year-long reflection on Biblical peacemaking. When faced with a fellow believer's intense anger and intolerance towards me, I sought Christ for a deeper understanding of peace, forgiveness, confession and reconciliation. In short, as a follower of Christ, how should I respond when treated badly?

Some verses to encourage you while dealing with conflict

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good. 1 Peter 4:19

The One who calls you is faithful and He will do it. 1 Thess. 5:24

Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Gal. 6:1

As for God, His way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in Him. Psalm 18:30

Helpful links

Peacemaker Ministries

Peacemaker has numerous resources and articles, among them are key articles such as Women and Peacemaking, Getting to the Heart of Conflict, Adequate Confession, and True Forgiveness

Tara Barthel co-author of the book, "Peacemaking Women: Biblical Hope for Resolving Conflict"


Helpful Books

Peacemaking Women by Tara Klena barthel and Judy Dabler, Published by Baker, 2005

Resolving Conflict by Jill Briscoe, David C. Cook Publisher, 2003

The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict, Third Edition by Ken Sande, Published by Baker, 2003

Thriving through Ministry Conflict: By Understanding Your Red and Blue Zones by James P. Osterhaus, Joseph M. Jurkowski, Todd A. Hahn, Zondervan Publisher, 2005


Pastors´ Wives Thriving
Message Board

Click Here

PW´s Thriving Blog

Click Here

How Does The Message Board Work?

Our Message Board is open to any pastor's wife who has registered. This makes for a safe place to "be ourselves" without judgment. An online message board works like this: One person types a question, situation, or statement. Other members of the Board can read it and reply under what the previous person has written. Most posts receive numerous replies; some long some short.

How Do I Become a Member of the Message Board?

Want to know how to register for the Message Board?

Want to know the Terms of Service for the Message Board?

Concerned about our Privacy Policy?

Ready to sign up?